20 Things I Never Thought I Would Say

I got this idea from another blog I was reading so I have to give credit to where credit is due. Thanks Janet T.!

1) Why did you put toothpaste in your brother's hair?

2) Why did you put toothpaste in your hair?

3) Don't shoot your weapons (bow and arrow) in the house!!!

4) No, I don't think Narwhal's are born with their tusks so that they can break out of their eggs.?!?!

5) No bad words allowed when you're playing scrabble!!!

6) Yes, it is funny that you tricked your brother into eating that garlic clove (he sure does stink!!) but quit being a stinker yourself!!!

7) Why do I hear water running (never a good thing) ?

8) Do I even want to ask why you boys are digging into the dry wall with a bread knife?

9) Why do I smell burning dust?

10) Why is it so stinking hot in here (no menopause yet, just the thermostat set high - phew!!)?

11) Why does it smell like baby powder down here?

12) Why is this fish food container so empty?

13) What are you boys trying to do with those sticks, magnifying glass, and paper?

14) Don't yell "Mom, come watch me set off my bomb!" outside where the neighbors can hear - Do you want social services at our door?

15) No, you can't marry me if your father dies mysteriously and I have no husband!

16) Stay off the trampoline, I still have to spray off your brother's poop!!!

17) It's not bleeding - you'll be just fine.

18) Yes, it's bleeding. No, you don't have to go to the hospital but let me just call Dad to be sure. No, no, no, it's really fine, I just need to talk to Dad, but you're just fine.

19) No, you don't have a huge hole in your head, just a really teeny tiny one. No, no, no, it's really not that big. Hush, it's alright. It's barely big enough for large amounts of blood to come out. No, no, no there's hardly any blood. No, YOU WON'T BLEED TO DEATH.

20) Monsters, Mommy is here and Mommy means business. RRRRRRARRRR