Accepting Reality

I’m back!! My cold wasn’t really a cold – it was a nasty sinus infection.

I was stubborn and didn’t want to go on antibiotics like last time.  It was manageable as long I did 6 sinus rinses a day and keep on top of the Advil. 

Manageable means that I was functioning but barely.  It’s a time when you prioritize everything and that means that things like blogging are replaced with more life nourishing activities such as napping or resting. 

It’s good to get sick, really I mean that.  You realize how much you rely on the LORD again.  When you have nothing to go on but your knees – it’s humbling, over-whelming and grace-infused all rolled into one.  So…what does that mean for my over-zealous, well-meaning and wonderful Spring Cleaning Bonanza? It means that I have had to accept that it was all of those things and it felt very invigorating and accomplished while it lasted but…who am I kidding?

I had to take a real good look into myself and ask myself some hard questions. 

First off: Can I do it in the busy month of June? Answer: No, not unless someone comes here and does all of my regular duties that I need to do during the day.  Any takers? – tehe!!!  No, not unless I am granted the miraculous ability to get up at 5am. 

Second off: Who am I?  Yes, I know that’s a biggie!!  I was getting panicky about failing to complete the goals despite all my rationalizations of not being able to.  Big reality check – I am foremost Daughter of the King, second, Wife to one great guy, and last but certainly not least a Mother to six.  That’s just the tip of the iceberg but it’s a huge tip there at the top of that iceberg!! 

Sometimes, I lose my focus and when I get weighed down by my own mind accusing me of things or with my earthly body and its limitations, Then, I am glad that the LORD reminds me and re-focuses me of where I should be in body and spirit.  In HIM and HIS Word as a wife and mother. 

What sorts of things do I accuse myself of?  Well, instead of naming ALL of them let me share the one that I just recently came to terms with.  Here it is and it will surprise you because maybe you’ll be expecting some huge confession but it’s sillier than that. 

Wait for it...wait for it...

I AM NOT A SEWER!!!  

Whew!!  I got it out and I have come to terms with it and I’ll explain what I mean.  I love quilting and I love making quilts BUT I do not do it every day and I do not it every week or even every month.  It comes in spurts and it’s always been that way.  SOME day I may have more time to quilt but even then I don’t know if I’ll do it more often then I do.  So, the accusation of late, has been “Why can’t you sew more often like…so and so?”  or  “Why can’t you run a sewing blog like so and so?” and so on.  I have been mean to myself.  That’s okay because sometimes my dear self deserves it but this time I put my foot down.  I realized that quilting is a part of my life and it’s a part that I love and I will always go back to it.  I acknowledge that other women (and some men) do this for a living (run a blog or a store)  and even just part-time and they LOVE it more than I do OR have more time for it than I do and that’s okay.

So, yes, I sew, and yes, I quilt, but would I describe myself as an avid quilter? No, but I used to and then I would feel like I was running in a race having a hard time keeping up. Instead I should say "I am an enthusiastic and passionate quilter person who indulges in the process when the spirit moves her".  Having insight into this has released A LOT of pressure I was putting on myself to be someone I wasn’t and has given focus for the things that I am called to do but also other things that I enjoy like baking, cooking, writing, organizing things, and relationships.

Having said all that, I have a project that I finished that I want to share.  I am super excited to show it because it was a year in the making for a friend who turned forty and then moved away (she didn’t move because she turned 40!). I still miss her :( but this quilt has been helpful in dealing with those feelings.  

It's a chinese coins pattern used with some jelly rolls that my sister gave me. I knew I made a good color choice when my son, who knows this mother well, said "Mom, when I look at those colors, I can totally see Mrs. So and So. in them!" I hit the mark!! 

As you know, these are not colors I am naturally drawn to but by the end of making this quilt I was actually considering them for another quilt!!   

It was super easy to put the top together.  In hindsight I wish I had made the borders all the same fabrics. 

It's not such a huge deal - I am still very pleased with the overall quilt. 

Show your face Aleana!!  

The reason it took so long for me to finish was the quilting.  I decided to do the whole quilt in free-motion. A feat I never before dared to try!!!  I would work until something frustrating would happen(like the thread breaking)  and I would have to put it away.  I am glad that I attempted this very SCARY skill.  Now that I have done it once, I know I can do it again because it really just takes practice and for this one I focused on loops, stars, hearts and various different types of flowers. At times (note the "at times" phrase), it was fun!!   

The backing was a "Brazilian" fabric (not from Brazil but reminded me of it) that I had been eyeing for a long time on my shelf.  It fit in perfectly with the other colors.  Yah!! 

I am very happy with this quilt which is unusual for me.  Usually by the end of it, I am really disappointed about something but not this one!!  This is pleasing because it was my second attempt.  I gave the first attempt to Aleana as she really liked it despite all its flaws.

Now that this one is finished I can take pictures and blog about Number One another time soon :).   

It looks so pretty in the miniature red maple. 

That's my free hanging basket from Superstore.  It looked pretty sad when I first got it (free, doesn't always mean good quality) but with some love it is surviving.  

Thanks for reading!!!